Published: July 09, 2009 11:37 pm      

Sleeptalking in Seattle

Orioles manager Dave Trembley went medieval Tuesday night in Seattle, popping his cork in the first inning of the Orioles’ eventual 12-4 win over the Mariners after yet another one of those umpires’ calls went against his club. Real or imagined, Trembley felt slighted — or maybe slightly paranoid — after home plate umpire Tom Hallion ruled Nolan Reimold was entitled to go only from first to third rather than to home on a two-base ruling of an errant throw from the Seattle outfield. In Hallion’s mind, Reimold had yet to reach second base. In Trembley’s mind that meant Hallion was telling him, “Your team doesn’t play hard.”

Trembley argued the call initially, but then in the bottom half of the inning after talking to Reimold, who assured his manager he hustled on the play and was well past second base and should have been awarded home plate, the Orioles manager burst from the dugout, went chest-to-chest with the horrid man in blue, taking off his hat and slam-dunking it behind the ump after the ump had ejected him from the game.

After Tuesday’s outburst, I was able to talk with the Orioles skipper, and he told me what became of him after he had been ejected for the fourth time this season.

Trembley actually said all of what follows, and what follows his comments are my comments to him. Now keep in mind, the Orioles manager had no idea he was in a conversation with me as I was reading his comments on mlb.com an entire continent away, 12 hours after he had made them in a postgame tirade. That’s why Trembley’s words are in quotations — they’re attributed quotes. My part of the conversation is italicized.

Trembley began our conversation with, “In the clubhouse, you get a 10-second delay ...”

On the clubhouse TV?

“ ... and that's why I had to get out to the runway, so I can get it live, and hide behind the cop, who was real nice and let me stand behind him so I could get a good look in the dugout.”

You were hiding behind a cop. What cop?

“You know, I stood behind the King County Sheriff for the whole game.”

The, uh, King County Sheriff.

“I'll be honest with you.”

You have no reason to lie.

“I'll tell you the honest-goodness truth. I stood behind the King County Sheriff, right behind him in the dugout, and he let me watch it.”

He didn’t rat you out?

“And every once in a while he screened it for me like a pick in basketball so nobody could see me.”

And nobody saw you ...

“I didn't have my hat on or my glasses on.”

So you were in disguise.

“I had my shower shoes on, didn't have a top on.”

Moving on ...

“I watched the whole game from down there and then Kranny ...”

Kranny? That would be pitching coach Rick Kranitz?

“ ... was asking me, 'What do you think about that?' 'Well, don't let Hendrickson go back out there any longer.’ ”

That would be reliever Mark Hendrickson.

“ ‘He's done. Put Albers in. ’ ”

Matt Albers ...

“You know, I think we need to put this guy in. Let's go from there.’ ”

So the King County Sheriff hid you while you watched and managed ... or whatever it is you do ... a game you were legally thrown out of? I wonder what they’d try to do to Dave Goad if he did that?

“You laugh, you think I'm funny.”

No, actually, I don’t think you’re funny at all.

“You have no idea what I've gone through.”

No, I really don’t. But then, you have no idea what I’ve gone through.

“No idea.”

You know, right now I just can’t shake the image of Nixon talking to the White House portraits during the final days.

“I can't talk for a week now, my hat is a mess.”

You can’t talk for a week now because your hat is a mess? Won’t Mr. Angelos give you another one?

“That's OK.”

Hey, I didn’t touch your hat. You were the one throwing it out there.

“We won the game.”

Yes, Dave.

“We got some big hits when it counted and the guys played well.”

The guys played well, Dave. Now get some rest; you had a big night. And any time now you’ll wake up only to discover this has all been a very arduous, very confusing and very perplexing dream.

As I hope we all soon will.

Mike Burke is sports editor of the Cumberland Times-News. Contact Mike Burke at mburke@times-news.com.